12/11/2004

Today is My Fortieth Birthday

And you know what? I feel kind of fabulous (Kenehora, poo, poo, poo). I woke up this morning to the most amazing pile of gifts. A T-shirt over a long-sleeve shirt from Zeke on Sophie's advice ("I've noticed Mama's wearing this style nowadays."), lovely earrings from my parents, and...an opera-length string of the most beautiful Akoya pearls any oyster has ever vomited up. Salt water, Japanese, faintly blushed pink, and just about the sexiest thing I've ever known. Why are pearls so luscious? It's something about the weight of them, and the smoothness. I wanted to strip naked as soon as I put them around my neck.

My husband is a dream when it comes to gifts (really in all ways, but I don't want you to send me hate mail). He's got an amazing, innate sense of what I'm going to love. And he knows I'm the kind of person who needs to see things wrapped in boxes.

This whole forty thing is not so bad. Skip the next part if you can't deal with birthday-smugness. In this past decade I've produce four children, transformed myself from a lawyer into a writer, published six books and written three more that will be published over the course of the next year, bought a house, and, most importantly, made friends. A whole pile of wonderful friends. At my thirtieth birthday Michael made a tea party for my girlfriends and me. He rented linens, a silver tea service, dishes etc. He made cakes, tea sandwiches and scones. He dressed himself in a tuxedo (all but the jacket) and served. It was fabulous, but the sad part was that none of the women there were really good friends. They were what passed for friends in my life then. Now, he's making a little dinner party, and I love everyone who is coming. Each one is a tremendously important part of my life.

I'm a little fatter now than I was at thirty (OK, about ten pounds heavier) and my boobs sag. I've got a little flap of loose skin at my belly, courtesy of four C-Sections. I've got some crows feet, my jaw line sags, and there are a few lines showing up on my upper lip. But my husband thinks I'm more beautiful than I've ever been, and part of me thinks he's right. I'm certainly happier than I've ever been. Thanks to my shrink and the glories of psychopharmacology, I'm finally able to enjoy the good things in life.

So all is good. (Kenehora, poo poo poo.) Knock wood. All is good.


591 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday, Ayelet!!!
I am eight years younger than you (not that I'm bragging or anything) but I know what you mean. This birthday one of my best friends threw me a party, and I walked around, thinking: Everyone here I just adore in some way. Even people I didn't know that well, I loved them. It was one of the best birthdays I ever had.
Cheers to the next decade!
Jennifer Gibbons

December 11, 2004 at 9:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Happy birthday!

(P.S. Found your blog via Liz Lawley's last week, and am loving it!)

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http://join-the-dots.org/

December 11, 2004 at 10:08 AM  
Blogger jett said...

Happy Birthday!

December 11, 2004 at 10:10 AM  
Blogger stephanie said...

Happy Birthday to one of my favorite bloggers! You've accomplished wonders in your life, and deserve to be proud. Congratulations on reaching such a happy age:). The mac and cheese is in the mail ;-)

December 11, 2004 at 10:25 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

Happy birthday, Ayelet! My 40th was equally wonderful. Far better than my 30th, where I was in the process of getting divorced and life was depressing and chaotic. It's still chaotic now, of course (two kids was enough for me...), but far less depressing.

December 11, 2004 at 1:44 PM  
Blogger gayle said...

Happy, happy birthday, lovely Ayelet! May this whole decade be fabulous and fruitful and fun and full of all sorts of pearly goodness!

xoxo
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December 11, 2004 at 5:28 PM  
Blogger Ayelet Waldman said...

Thank you all so much!

December 11, 2004 at 6:07 PM  
Blogger MB said...

Happy Birthday! I also turned 40 this year, and find it somewhat liberating to finally put that purported landmark behind me.

I gave up my career and did the 4 kid in a decade thing as well, but went for politics rather than publishing, and will note you've be way more successful than I at your second career. Actually, it might be the Wesleyan thing curse - Election Day was not kind to most of us candidates up here who were Wesleyan alumns, including incumbents.

Well, maybe that luck will change in the next decade ;-).

May the next 40 years be as joyous as the last 10.

December 12, 2004 at 3:10 AM  
Blogger fiona said...

Have a happy, happy day. May the coming year bring you all that you wish for and more. And when things inevitably go off track every now and then, may you be blessed with enough friends and loved one to provide hugs and chocolate to get you back where you need to be.

You've been a great addition to my daily read - thanks Allison!

Much love from another "Bad Mother" across the pond

December 12, 2004 at 3:52 AM  
Blogger Psycho Kitty said...

Happy birthday!

December 12, 2004 at 10:06 AM  
Blogger Ayelet Waldman said...

MB -- what did you run for?

And Fiona -- thank you, sweetie.

December 12, 2004 at 10:35 AM  
Blogger MB said...

Maine House of Representatives. Lost by 25 votes to the former mayor of Portland. It was my first run for office, so I hope to do better next time. But we're moving, so it'll take some time to get re-established. Maybe by the time I'm 50 ;-).

December 12, 2004 at 1:00 PM  
Blogger Ayelet Waldman said...

Arg! 25 votes...

December 12, 2004 at 3:25 PM  
Blogger menina said...

the 11th was my birthday too!!

so Happy Birthday :D

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December 13, 2004 at 3:33 AM  
Blogger Rachel Ann said...

Happy Birthday (a couple of days late but I only found you today.) Glad you had a great time.

December 13, 2004 at 4:50 AM  
Blogger Esther Kustanowitz said...

Happy birthday, Ayelet! I love those mornings when you feel kind of fabulous. And I love your phrase about the oyster vomiting up your necklace. May all aspiring authors have your luck in books, and may all aspiring wives/mothers have your luck in husbands and children.

December 13, 2004 at 7:40 AM  
Blogger HeatherN said...

Not another year older but another year better...thanks for illustrating the point!

Glad you had a good one.

December 13, 2004 at 8:21 AM  
Blogger Scarlett said...

Happy 40th! I must say I really envy you, you seem to have a wonderful hubby, family (and a nanny) and a career I dream of. May it long continue! What you say about friends really touched me. I have been in the States three years and have NO close friends. My dear and beloved friends who I grew up with in South Africa are dispersed (like all us SAfricans are) in Israel, Canada, UK, Australia and SA. Not growing older with them or sharing our lives is such a horrible void in my life. I am so grateful for email, IM and Skype, but it's just not the same as hanging out in person. *sigh*
Daniella

December 13, 2004 at 8:05 PM  
Blogger Ayelet Waldman said...

Oh Daniella. I'm sorry. But you know, it took me four years here in Berkeley. Seriously. Four years before I had good friends. I think four years is kind of the minimum to adjust to a new place, even a new city. And you've transplanted yourself across the globe. It'll happen, I know it will. And until then, blog on, lady.

December 13, 2004 at 9:47 PM  
Blogger Manolo said...

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