Tree Trimming
Last night we went to my friend Lucy's house to trim her tree. Us Jews just love a good tree trimming. Her children are totally cynical about the tree -- they want it done, but they'd rather play the X-Box. Mine, on the other hand, were in Seventh Heaven. Even Abraham stopped whining for long enough to hang a little wooden sleigh on the very lowest bough.
The one time I had a non-Jewish roommate who wasn't going home for the holidays (crazy loft in Soho, crazy Australian roommate, crazy fight that had me packing up and leaving in the middle of the night) I insisted we get a tree. I had in my mind exactly what I wanted: full boughs, squat and not too tall, white lights, wooden ornaments, nothing too big or flashy. I'd thought it all through. In fact, I had the whole thing decorated when I was in fifth grade. I love Christmas trees, but I would never do a Hanukkah bush. Way too cheesy. Instead I just covet.
Nowadays I force my family and myself on our non-Jewish friends. We show up, ornaments in hand, and interject ourselves into their tree rituals. Of course no seems to have the kind of elaborate Brady-Bunch tree trimming ritual that I'd fantasized about my whole life. Nine times out of ten, it's mom trimming all by herself, with occasional shouts for a tall man to nail something to the ceiling. They generally don't object to our presence, because at least there's someone in the house excited about the process, even if those someones aren't relatives.
Now I just have to figure out a way to get us invited somewhere for an Easter egg hunt.
172 Comments:
Hey there-
I love trimming trees; I haven't done it in so long because my mom is allergic to pine needles. Isn't that awful??? We had a fake tree but we gave it away when we moved.
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Ayelet, you can come trim our metal tree! It's actually been up all year. Our plan was to have it be a holiday tree (we would hang hearts on Valentines Day, mini trees on Arbor Day, etc.), but the only thing dangling from it right now are some potholders that Hannah made from a kit. I think the tree will go down after this holiday season. I need to hang some dreidels on it now.
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In my opinion, it makes no difference. I mean, it's a Christmas tree, let's call a Christmas tree a Christmas tree.
In my opinion, it makes no difference. I mean, it's a Christmas tree, let's call a Christmas tree a Christmas tree.
I don't get it. Why do you feel obsessed with decorating a Xmas tree? Do you obsess as much about Chanukah? Why teach your Jewish kids to trim xmas trees? Am I missing something?
I think (and A. can correct me if I am wrong) that the children are Jewish on her side, and Michael Chabon is not Jewish, so maybe they celebrate both traditions.
I think it's great; I just came back from a event at my college called The Festival of Light and Dark-where each person talks about their religion-then light a candle.
Jennifer
Michael is as Jewish as they come. The Christmas tree thing comes from JEALOUSY. I spent my childhood staring at Christmas trees from outside on the sidewalk. I love them. LOVE THEM. I have no idea why, except maybe as part of a whole self-hating Jew thing. Or maybe it's just because they're PRETTY. I don't know. Anyway, we do it so the kids won't feel the same jealousy. They get to decorate a tree, too! And then they get the Hannukka fat-fest.
Oh, and one more thing. I'd NEVER have on in my house. So that's why we have to go to other people's tree-trimmings. Our neighbors have a Hanukka bush, and I feel nothing but disdain. :)
You have a legitimate claim to a tree but don't set one up??? Horrors. Where do you live? I'll do yours next year...
I love this post! I had serious tree-envy and was totally into decorating them, just like you, until I hooked up with a Dane with tree-fixation and we had a kid, and then I became extremely ambivalent due to the whole interaith-family thing. I wrote a whole long megilla of a post about it a few days ago. It breaks my heart that I can no longer merrily crash people's tree-trimming parties but instead have become all sulky and disapproving and frum about it in my own home. But I'm trying not to be. But apparently (according to my partner) I am anyway.
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Don't know if you read comments on old posts, but...there's this fabulous book called "There's No Such Thing as a Chanukah Bush, Sandy Goldberg" that I read to my kids each year, and read part of to my daughter's second-grade class this year. (Can't remember the author of course...darn it.) Puts it in perfect perspective, about how much fun it can be to celebrate other people's holidays with them, but that you don't then bring that holiday home with you, just like you might invite a Christian person to your Passover seder, but you don't expect them to then go home and change out their dishes and throw out their bread.
We decorate a Christmas tree with our friends Marc and Glen every year, and then stay at their house for Chistmas eve and Christmas day, and the kids look forward to both events avidly. They also both believe in Santa Claus because, as Em put it to me last year, "He's a really nice guy, and he doesn't care if we're Jewish. He likes us anyway."
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