The Heartland Has None
In today's New York Times some moron by the name of John D. Morris, who calls himself a "retail analyst ... who [leads] 'shop-alongs,'” announced that the reason stores are hawking Live Strong bracelets and Teddy Bears for charity is because "This is a born-again Christmas" with "echoes of the Heartland."
Where do I even begin?
First of all, I'm willing to bet that average giving for born-again Christians is a fraction of what it is for us selfish and evil liberals. I'm willing to bet that the only thing the vast majority of born-again Christians give to is their local televangelist to help him buy his-and-her matching jets. I don't know for sure, but if someone tracked charitable donations, I'm willing to bet that the blue states would leave the red in the dust. After all, us liberals are the ones voting against our interests. Us liberals are the ones all tied up in knots about things like the family farm. Us liberals are the ones who tax ourselves to death to support the crackers riding around in their pickups in Arkansas.
But I'm sure they buy more Live Strong bracelets then we do. Maybe that's because on average we give more than a dollar to charity. And maybe it's because we don't need to make a fashion statement advertising our generosity. You know who wears those bracelets in my house? My kids. And you know why? Because other kids do.
Think before you pink!