1/22/2005

"Will They Have People In Carmel?"

You have to wonder what small children are thinking. They have no idea at any given moment where they are going, or what they are doing. How many times have I just loaded the kids into the car (the little ones) and shlepped them off to run errands. They kind of just go with the flow, and then every once in a while they say something that highlights the extent of their true cluelessness. On our way down to Carmel this weekend, Rosie asked, "Will they have people in Carmel?" Excuse me, what? What did she even think Carmel was? For all she knew, we could have been heading off to spend the weekend in prison. Turns out I had even bothered to explain we were spending the night there. She thought we'd moved.

Obviously, we went on that roadtrip -- and I emerged victorious in the DVD battle! Michael set up his laptop for the kids to watch movies on. We drove all the way to Carmel accompanied by The Country Bears. Unfortunately, Michael and I had to listen to it, too, and couldn't even put on music of our own. I only mentioned once during the whole ride that the built-in minivan DVD comes with headphones for every kid. I thought that was very restrained of me. And I probably wouldn't have said anything at all if the profound sadness of Bonnie Raitt's presence in that movie hadn't overwhelmed me with a deep and abiding despair at the transience of success.

I never expect vacations to be anything but horrible, probably because as a kid all we ever did for "vacation" was go visit my dad's family in Montreal. Not that that was necessarily horrible, but it was no Disneyland, let me tell you. Tea with the Aunties is all well and good, but when you're seven, the Yiddish jokes wear thin.

I'm always surprised when trips turn out to be actually fun, which this weekend has been. Don't get me wrong, Sophie and Zeke are at each other's throats ("He's making that sound again." "She called me butthead."), but despite that, and despite the fact that this evening Abie was possessed by a Dybbuk (no other explanation for his twenty minutes of hysterical screaming makes sense), we're having a lovely time.

Everyone loved the Aquarium (Monterey), but I won't bore you with details. I will say one thing, however. Forgive me, but I just can't get myself worked up about the potential extinction of the Great White Shark. I know I'm being terribly shortsighted, I know how important predators are to ecosystems, blah blah blah. But my mother took me to see Jaws when I was a kid, and then to see Jaws II when I had only just recovered from the first one, and I haven't been able to swim in the ocean since. I'm in a constant state of Great White panic. Frankly, I don't even like swimming in lakes and ponds. If I can't see the bottom, there's always the chance of shark attack. I swear to God I read once about a freshwater shark. Or not. Still. It's a phobia, it doesn't need to make sense.

We go to Hawaii every year, and I spend almost no time in the ocean. The kids are like little sea lions, splashing around, swimming out to the diving platform. Every afternoon I wade majestically out a few yards -- wearing my sunhat and with my UV protective coverup trailing in the waves. I flick my hands at the water once or twice and say, "Oy, what a machieh." Then I hightail it back to the beach where the chances of having my limbs gnawed off by an eight-foot-long beast are slightly lower. Yes, I'm your seventy-six-year-old Tante Sadie. What can I say. And this year I get to add a whole other anxiety to my Great White phobia (which, I must add, is pretty reasonable, as phobias go, given that the Big Island is on the Great White migration route, and don't forget that surfer kid who got her arm bitten off just two years ago. But I digress.) I'm planning on adding tsunamis to my list of vacation-related anxieties. A neurotic Jewish girl can figure out a way to make any tragedy feed her own craziness, no matter how distant and unlikely. It's a special talent we have.

Oh, and one other note from the field. In case you're wondering if Shout wipes take out strawberry jello, the answer is no.

571 Comments:

Blogger TR said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

January 23, 2005 at 7:52 AM  
Blogger TR said...

A-
Your phobias are one of the reasons I like you. I also stopped swimming in the ocean because of sharks and I now refuse to go out in smaller boats to the open ocean because of "The Perfect Storm". Lakes and ponds are out for another reason: snakes. Now I confine my swimming to pools. Whatever is lurking there I can't see, therefore it can't hurt (and if it does there are always antibiotics.)

January 23, 2005 at 7:56 AM  
Blogger gwenda said...

I have the Jaws phobia too, but mine presents in the most ridiculous way possible: I'm always a little scared when I'm in a swimming pool, especially if there's not very many people in it, and stay very, very far away from the drain. This is mostly due to my brother's terrorizing me with his constant verbal interpretation of Jaws one summer at the pool.

Bleh. On Hawaii though, you're absolutely right to be afraid. We were flying over Maui once and our pilot stopped to point out the tiger sharks -- probably 50 of them -- just on the outside of a reef from the beach. Later, the best car driver ever told us that if we ever encountered a tiger shark up close we should just bop it on the nose. Yeah. Right.

January 23, 2005 at 8:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, I was just old enough to see Jaws in the theaters when it came out. And since it was a huge hit, I was eager to do so.

My dad saw it. And then he did an interesting thing. He didn't forbid me to see it. He simply asked if I would trust him, and decide of my own free will not to see it.

"Why, Dad?"

"Because you love the ocean. And after you see this, you won't love the ocean anymore. It isn't worth that."

I thought for a while, and finally concluded that it made sense to me. I absolutely did love the ocean--Jacques Cousteau was my hero--and losing that did seem like too high a price to pay for two hours of onscreen titilation. Whenever I catch a snippet of the movie on TV nowadays (it's kinda hokey, in my opinion), I send off a mental note of thanks to my dad for presenting the matter in such terms. He didn't want to censor me, just make me aware of what I was putting in my head, that I had an interior ecology of thought. All the more impressive since he was a screenwriter himself.

Of course, maybe he was just winging it, and wanted to save five bucks. Now that I'm a parent myself, I realize how pretty much everything is improvised on the fly.

January 23, 2005 at 9:36 AM  
Blogger Psycho Kitty said...

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I cannot abide sharks, although for the sake of my son (who, being a 5-year old boy, loves the damned things) I manage to keep up a pretense. I hope you've never seen "Watson and the Shark," at the National Gallery of Art? Unsuspectingly walking in on that painting nearly gave me a coronary. It's truly one of the most horrific things I've ever seen. I'm getting the willies just thinking about it.

January 23, 2005 at 12:53 PM  
Blogger Psycho Kitty said...

Oh, and Anon--your dad sounds *brilliant.*

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Blogger Psycho Kitty said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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Blogger elswhere said...

Oh, dear. That is sad about Bonnie Raitt.

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Blogger Ayelet Waldman said...

Anon, your dad is a genius. My mother took me to see Dawn of the Dead. When I was ten.

January 23, 2005 at 5:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Along the lines of Rosie's question, when my oldest was 6 we took a road trip from St. Paul to Denver. When we stopped at a McDonald's for lunch in Iowa, there was a man of limited mental capacity working there who paid a lot of attention to my 6 year old, shaking his hand and patting him on the head. As we crossed the border into Nebraska, my son remarked, "Boy, those Iowa people sure were nice!"

So there you have it--one retarded man in McDonald's came to represent an entire populace in the mind of a 6 year old.

Cathy

January 23, 2005 at 5:41 PM  
Blogger Scarlett said...

What a shame so many people are terrified of the ocean. I have always lived inland, but in 2001 I lived for a year in Florida and swam in the sea every day. For me it was heavenly, a real spiritual experience - uplifting, glorious, beautiful...awesome! To all of you with your phobias, try to get over them, you don't know what you are missing! The odds of a shark attack or tsunami are completely minimal, you have more chance of being eaten by a pitbull!

January 23, 2005 at 8:33 PM  
Blogger JL said...

I am always terrified of the potential for sharks. I saw that diCaprio movie (can't remember the name, but it was about an island) with a shark attack and had to sponge bathe for two weeks. I can't go in chlorinated pools, even.

It's an odd thing to fear, isn't it? Not like you can claim that you know someone who's been attacked...

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