1/13/2005

So Much To Say

There are so many serious things I should be blogging about today. For example:

1. Two cases, Booker and Fanfan, have been decided, and the Supreme Court has radically changed the Federal Sentencing Guidelines. Some of you who know me from my life outside of this blog (is there life outside of the blogosphere?) will recall that I take a serious interest in sentencing, especially in the way the Guidelines are constructed and used. In brief (very brief), the Sentecing Guidelines are a series of rules requiring federal judges to give specific sentences to defendants. Judges were constrained by the guidelines; they could not use their discretion to decrease a sentence if, say, a man filed an incorrect mortgage application in order to get refinancing to pay for alterations to his home made necessary by the fact that his profoundly retarded daughter had to leave the rehabilition facility that had been caring for her. That, by the way, was an actual case of mine.

In Booker/Fanfan the Court has ruled, essentially, that the Guidelines should be just that, guidelines, not hard and fast regulations. (For more information on this, in a readable format, go to your local library and pick up a copy of my novel, Daughter's Keeper.)

I think this is without a doubt the correct resolution of the case, and I'm terrified of it. Now, with an entrenched and emboldened Republican majority in Congress, I fear that their reaction to this case will be to make life even harder for defendants and judges.

Keep your fingers crossed.

2. Prince Harry has proved, once and for all, the importance of genetic diversity in the breeding of human beings. I, for one, am responding to the latest proof of his blithering idiocy by requiring my children to marry outside our genetic cohort.

3. Human Rights Watch has just issued a report condemning US actions in Iraq and elsewhere. Surprise Surprise. Thank you, Militiary Intelligence, Rumsfeld and cronies. Next time a US soldier is tortured you can congratulate yourself on doing your bit to decimate the Geneva Convention.


But I don't want to blog about any of that. I want to blog about something else. I want to blog about The Person With Whom I Live and how goddamn irritating he can be sometimes. I want to blog about how maddening it is to live with someone who immediately gets to his feet when dinner is over and rushes to the computer in the kitchen to choose music by which to clean up. This decision invariably takes precisely the same amount of time as it takes me to actually clean up the kitchen. So I load the dishwasher, while The Person With Whom I Live waffles over whether Keren Ann or Fountains of Wayne provides the best clean up music. The Person With Whom I Live hovers over the keyboard, scrolling through itunes, and invariably decides that he must purchase something new, something especially composed to assist with the cleanup. By then I have swept the floor and wiped off the counters. The Person With Whom I Live finally chooses a Shonen Knife cover of a Carpenters' song, just as I am squeezing out the sponge and turning on the dishwasher. When The Person With Whom I Live is confronted about this incredibly aggravating behavior of his, he replies, "Just give me a walk on this one." Thus, a situation is set up by which I am the unreasonable bitch for not "giving him a walk," and he is the reasonable, sensitive soul. I am seriously considered smacking The Person With Whom I Live upside the head with a frying pan.

This, by the way, is the same person who decided that it would be fun to give Zeke a buzz cut ... with his beard-trimmer. I came home from the gym one day to find Zeke sitting on a chair, hanks of hair at his feet, gaping bald spots on his head, and The Person With Whom I Live mumbling, "Don't cry. When Mommy comes home she'll tell us how to fix it."



466 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, that version of Top of the World is just excellent, so I must commend The Person With Whom You Live's musical taste.

However, I think when he heads for the computer to begin his selection process, I'd head for the sofa, and however long it takes for him to get in there and clean is however long it takes.

Reecie

January 13, 2005 at 12:01 PM  
Blogger marrije said...

Ha! He's not perfect after all! Hallelujah.

January 13, 2005 at 12:04 PM  
Blogger 21st Century Mom said...

I have so very many responses to your post but I will limit myself to 2.

1). I am half way through your book right now and it is making me very, very nervous. Couple it with Joan Ryan's column today and I am a complete wreck. I actually worry that one of my kids might be picked up for a crime he or she did not commit and be subjected to days or weeks or months or even years in prison. Horrifying. (Great book, by the way)

2). You could solve the irritation with The Person with Whom You Live by sitting on the couch reading a book while he chooses music. Or, more likely, by hanging out with your kids. Once the appropriate music is chosen you will be too deeply engaged in something else to clean the kitchen and it will be all his. HA!

January 13, 2005 at 12:14 PM  
Blogger 21st Century Mom said...

crap - my link didn't work. Here it is again

that would be Joan Ryan of the SF Chron. Now that I think of it you might have to register at the site to read the article. Registration is free and they never send spam.

January 13, 2005 at 12:16 PM  
Blogger Mommy said...

Hello Ayelet,
It was by chance that I found your blog. A rare coincidence. I met you a couple of years ago while we struggled to pump together. I was on the EP'ing board over on yahoo. I was wondering how you were doing and how your books were. I'm very excited to have found your blog!! I just started blogging last week and I'm loving it.
I'm so sorry that the person with which you live is driving you crazy. I have to admit that the person with which I live drives me crazy as well.
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January 13, 2005 at 12:41 PM  
Blogger Liz said...

Couldn't agree more with all of your thoughts on the Federal Sentencing Guidelines - the right decision, but one which has some frightening potential ramifications. Also, Prince Harry, WTF? He said he was sorry if anyone was offended. Now that's a non-apology if I have ever read one. I think he has been taking sincerity lessons from Kobe Bryant.

The Person With Whom You Live sounds like the Person With Whom I Live, who cannot start a home improvement project to save his life, until we need to deep clean the house because we are having company, and suddenly he turns into Bob Vila. . . .

January 13, 2005 at 1:59 PM  
Blogger ladymathematician said...

I've just picked up your book today, to read on my vacation. You'll be in a hammock on the beach in Jamaica on way or another next week...

As for The Person With Whom You Live, it is stories such as yours which make me worry that I am becoming a confirmed bachelorette, as the idea of other people in my space is starting to bother me. The idea of The Person With Whom I Will Live With One Day In The Future asking for "a walk" when they successfully avoided washing the dishes makes me gash my teeth.

January 13, 2005 at 3:09 PM  
Blogger Jenq said...

You have TPWWYL very well trained. He knows that if he dawdles over musical choices, the job will be done by the time he has selected something. I suggest some re-training. As others have suggested, swallow that bile (trust me, I know of what I speak, TPWWIL has some similar habits) and go elsewhere. As long as he really cleans up (this may come as a surprise to him, since he apparently hasn't actually had to do it too often), and you don't have to, he can listen to whatever he wants. But the kitchen must be clean prior to breakfast time. Good luck!

January 13, 2005 at 4:52 PM  
Blogger Psycho Kitty said...

Snort. How *did* Mommy fix that one?
Yep, I'm voting for the couch.

January 13, 2005 at 6:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I used to take to the sofa and wait as Hubby got distracted first by one thing, then another, inevitably leaving the dishes unwashed, the counters cruddy and the floor a mess. On my way to bed (I need far more sleep than he does), i'd remind him to do the dishes, and he'd promise that he would. Of course, he "forgot" and left them for me to clean up in the morning while waiting for the coffee pot to finish puking out a full pot.

He also "forgot" to take out the trash habitually, too.

At first, I'd do the damn dishes and take out the damn trash while he slept. Then I got smart: I put all of the dishes in a laundry hamper, bagged up the garbage, and took it all out to his car. Little did I know that it was a morning he'd planned to go to work late. (Or, maybe I did but I "forgot". I'll never tell.) So, the stuff sat in there, in direct sunlight, until noon when he finally left for work. His car still stinks.

But the dishes get done right away after dinner now, and the garbage goes out nightly. Heh.

- Venomous Kate

January 13, 2005 at 7:04 PM  
Blogger Ayelet Waldman said...

Oh my GOD. Kate. You are a the queen. You are the mother snake.
The Person insists that I point out how many times he goes around the house cleaning up after me, putting my dirty clothes in the hamper, putting my dishes in the dishwasher. (Which he can't do to save his life, might I add).

We're having a bit of a domestic fracas over here.

January 13, 2005 at 11:36 PM  
Blogger Psycho Kitty said...

Did you point out that if he wants sympathy, he has to start his *own* blog?

January 14, 2005 at 11:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My life partner also has to choose a musical accompaniment for every activity. Before he sets out in the car, he has to set his iPod. Before he washes dishes, he has to set up the stereo. I thought this was really annoying until my friend told me that her husband picks all the music he will listen to on his morning commute, which is on foot and on the subway, before he leaves the house. Like he can't pick a new song while he's sitting on the train?

January 18, 2005 at 12:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

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I love reading this blog, it's very funny and inspiring. I was jealous
about your perfect husband until I read this post about his dishwashing delay tactics while finding the perfect music selection. My husband also drives me crazy with it. For every activity! Sonic rape, anyone? I just go to our home office, shut the door and read. I make him put the kids to bed too.
Also, loved the post about being done with volunteering at preschool. I do not miss the sand and glitter.
Thankfully my youngest started kindergarten last fall. Although today I spent the day chaperoning my daughter's class field trip to El Sobrante...

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